Monthly Archives: June 2013

The elevator to success is out of order.


The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs…one step at a time. – Joe Girard

If you want to write a book, start by writing one line a day;
If you want to create the flossing habit, start by flossing one tooth a day;
If you want to clean the clutters in your room, start by throwing out one thing a day.
If you want to establish reading habit, start by reading one chapter a day;
If you want to have better communication with your partner, start by having one conversation at a time;
If you want to learn to exercise, start by marching in place for one minute a day;


The list can go on and on. Does it seem a lot easier when you do that one line, one tooth, one book or one minute? If you continue that “one”’s, some time later, before realizing, you will find you are where you want to be. How? According to M. J. Ryan in her Preparing to Change, “Whenever we initiate a change, even a positive one, we activate fear in our emotional brain. If you the fear is big enough, the fight-to-flight response will go off and we will run from what we’re trying to do.” However, the small steps , the “one” don’t set off the response and we have opportunity to keep up the change.

Breaking down the process into small steps makes the whole process more rewarding and playful, as we can award ourselves with each step that we take. That is success. When we focus on the continuous success, the whole changing process seems more manageable and enjoyable. It’s also a great antidote to procrastination. You don’t have to do it all, just one small thing at a time. The things are so small that even if you mess up, it won’t be a mountain of screw-ups that makes you feel terrible. On the contrary, the successes we experienced will give us the courage and passion to continue and even to the finish line ahead of time. Once you’ve done the first step, put out the next one. It works just like this.

Take notes of that Chinese saying, “A journey of thousands of miles may not be achieved through accumulation of each single step, just as the enormous ocean may not be formed gathering every brook or stream.”

Read more – Success is a progressive process


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The Biggest Obstacle Standing in Your Way

I get asked, what is the biggest obstacle standing in the way of success? The answer is not something most will want to hear.

It’s YOU.

When it all comes down to it, you are the only thing that is stopping you from achieving whatever it is your heart desires. Success is an attitude. It is not money, wealth or power. Take away the money of a successful person and he’ll have it all back and more in a few years. Give an unsuccessful person a million bucks and chances are he’ll lose it all in a few years. The difference is their attitude.

The unsuccessful person blames his misfortunes on outside factors – it’s the tax man’s fault, the economy sucks, Obama didn’t change a thing, prices are too high, my wife won’t let me, etc. He’ll blame everything else except the one thing that is truly keeping him down. The successful person doesn’t blame outside factors for failing. He accepts failure as a requirement for success and learns from it.

They say successful people think differently than unsuccessful people. That’s not entirely true. They don’t think differently, they think opposite. An unsuccessful person hates failure. A successful person welcomes failure. An unsuccessful person works hard for money. A successful person has money work hard for him. An unsuccessful person takes. A successful person gives. An unsuccessful person will let someone else write his pay check and determine his net worth. A successful person writes his own pay check and determines his own net worth. The list goes on, but the point is a successful person has an opposite attitude from an unsuccessful person.

If you want to be successful, the first thing you need to change is your attitude. If you have the attitude of an unsuccessful person, then no amount of reading, coaching or training is going to make you successful. Once you change your attitude, things will open up for you.

At the end of the day, it’s not going to be me, or anyone else that’s going to make you successful. You are the only one standing between where you are now and where you want to be. Stop blaming outside factors and start to take responsibility and change your attitude to that of a successful person. You are the problem, but you are also the solution. Success begins and ends with you. I look forward to reading your success story.

Success is a mind thing..T.A.G It

T.A.G. means: Think big. Act big. Get big.

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Have you seen your progress?

Success is so widely used, and it seems that progress doesn’t even exist.  But one cannot attain any levels of success without being progressive or making progress.  If success is exclusively referring to people with large sums of money, it will cancel out every other success that people have, such as a teacher having his students graduating with high marks or a mother who navigates her way through life managing a household, husband, kids and holding down a job at the same time, are also very successful.  But they might be excluded from world of the successful as teachers and mothers don’t get paid millions of dollars. Success cannot only be measured by money. Use progress and be progressive in everything you’re doing to measure your success.  If the money comes, great! Look at it as a bonus for your hard work. 


If you want to be treated as a successful person, you have to act as so.  How?  Track your progresses along the way.  It can be a new way of filing the records on the shelf, realization of where you are along the way to your goal, another 100 meters that you run, showing up on time for an appointment instead of a few minutes behind, a five minute heart-to-heart talk with your mom if you haven’t done so recently……There are countless things out there for you to recognize and appreciate as your progresses, even if a simple smile on your face after a dragging morning workload.  When you have learned to recognize your progress, you will feel success is all around you, as YOU are the success. 

Ready!  Get set!  Go!

Read more about Being Progressive at RS

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Aggressive and Assertive

Happy Monday everyone! It’s time to shine.  Take aggressive actions.

Aggressive and Assertive. These are the two words that are synonymous of success.  For a very long time it has been said, being aggressive is negative, but rather one should try to be more assertive, which is considered more positive and acceptable. Let’s look at both words for a moment.

Here are the definitions of the two words in the dictionary.  None of them has been altered.

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The Meaning of That Cake

The three of us best friends finally get a chance to sit together to have a girls’ night out.  After a drink at the bar and an amazing summer special salad, we continued our chill out.

Cynthia spent quite some time describing the incredible Mother’s Day celebration she received from her sons, the special breakfast in bed prepared by Son No. 1 and the fruit salad by Son No. 2, the limited edition Barbra Streisand’s “Guilt Trip”, her favourite; and the best of all, two adult kids surprised her by sitting by her sides and watch the whole movie with her.  Both Anne and I couldn’t help admiring such a happy mother.  Cynthia told us that we need to cultivate the seeds for respect, appreciation and love.  Before Father’s Day, she would work together with the sons to come up with some celebrations; and every Mother’s Day, the father would do the same things with the sons for her.  Even after they separated later, she would still remind the boys of Father’s Day.  If she felt nothing would happen when Mother’s Day was approaching, she would call the father and remind him to talk with the boys about Mother’s Day.  It was her family tradition to celebrate Mother’s Day and Father’s Day. 

It might sound exaggerating, but on second thought, it is a way of showing that special person, that all their contributions and devotions are respected and appreciated.  Our kids are still young.  As parents, our respect to each other and our celebrations for each other are good examples to teach our kids how to treat their spouse when they grow up. 

The meaning of that birthday cake is to say “How special you are and I love you.”

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What was your achievement last week?

My biggest achievement in the last two weeks was learned to ride a bicycle.  I have never imagined that I am able to ride a bicycle.  I remember I tried once when I was in elementary school, but failed, afterwards I never tried again.  This time it actually was my daughter who gave me the push.  She is almost 7 years old, but she is still riding her pink bicycle with both training wheels.  It’s time to remove the training wheel, so she can learn to ride a real bicycle.  I know it must be hard riding a two-wheeled thing, but how hard it can be, how to explain to her the way to control and how to show her that it’s do-able.  The only solution would be that I learn to ride a bicycle without training wheels, so I know how to maneuver the bicycle and to show her that mommy can do it, so can she.  It was with such a strong wish that I managed to do it.  Seeing me riding my bigger bicycle, she was so willing to try.  Now she is much better than I.  Kids learn fast.

This experience reminded me of a story that I read in Mark Fisher and Marc Allen’s book How to Think Like a Millionaire:

“One day a wise man was asked by a disciple what it took to obtain wisdom.  The sage led the disciple to a river and plunged his head underwater.  After a few seconds, his anxious follower began struggling, afraid he was going to drown.  But the teacher continued to hold his head underwater.  The student struggled even harder.  Finally, the wise man let him go just before he would have drowned and asked him, “When you head was underwater, what did you want most?” “To breathe,” the frightened boy answered.  “Well, there you have it.  That’s exactly how much you must want wisdom.”

Thinking of the story today, I can still imagine the scene that the student struggled to get out of water to breath.  It was such a strong will.  Even though my experience of learning to ride a bike is far less vigorous then striving for survival, I would say, as a mother, finding the proper way to guide my child can be such a strong will that I will hold on to no matter what.  I can still see the bruises on my legs from the learning, but when I see that little girl riding around with confidence, all I can feel is proud, proud of her skills and my perseverance.

Once you have the feelings to do something as strong as striving to get your head out of water to breathe, I know, you will definitely achieve it.

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What does that mean….I created the term after being at a seminar and the speaker was talking about having an action plan and it should be like driving at night.  Due to the poor visibility, you are only able to see about 200 meters clearly in front of you.  I like the idea of what he said and the car – driving analogy.  But for a long time I believe that an action plan should be treated like a road map.  There will be some bumps and pot holes and some wrong turns along the way, even some accidents, but if you get back up dusting yourself off, get back on track and stay the course, you will eventually get to your destination.

Paulo Cohello said, “When you work towards a cause diligently, the universe will conspire to help you”. You see, it has no choice, because we’re all connected to the universe.  If you become one with it, it has no choice but to work with you.  I call it “Uni-Power”.  Most people work against the universe and put nothing but garbage into it by taking from it all they can get.  It’s like picking all the corns but don’t replant the seeds; it becomes a one time harvest, from which you will never get any more corns. This is how most of us live our lives.  We didn’t decide to or choose to do so, we just get caught up in the matrix, the day-after-day habits that we develop.

The matrix is very tricky.  It’s a strong hold on us.  What do I mean? We operate unconsciously.  We’re on auto pilot, unaware of our doings until interruptions in our lives. It’s like our body parts, we don’t understand the importance of a finger until it begins to hurt, when we suddenly realize how important it is to our daily operations. But, what if we paid attention to it before it hurts, it probably wouldn’t have gotten hurt in the first place.

Therefore, being conscious is important.  We have to pay attention to what we do, how we do it, where we are, how we are doing and how all of the doings impact our lives and the people around us. When we begin to do things for the greater good, great things happen to us and for us. We have to think we’re lucky.  We must believe it to the core and we do become magnets to all we want.  Suddenly our desires are met with very little bumps-road blocks; the right people shows up; some how the things that was very difficult to come, seem to always happen or come with ease; everything you touch turns to gold, gold just like you.

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